PK- The Victoria Secret Model

OK, I’ll have you note, that much like my soccer career, this never happened. Turns out you have to be taller than 4’10’ to a supermodel. So close. But real talk. The other day, my husband and I came across our honeymoon pictures from Jamaica. So young, so rested, and truthfully… we had trained together a lot for this trip so, we looked pretty good. I remember being on that trip and feeling so dissatisfied with how my pre baby, recent college grad, rock hard stomach version of twenty something self looked. I could smack that girl. Dumb. I would kill to look how ‘imperfect’ I thought I looked back in my newly-wed days.

The truth is. It was not my body that I was actually struggling with back in those honeymoon days. It was my mind. Because whether we want to acknowledge it, how we feel about ourselves is completely mental. I just know that is going to rub someone the wrong way. But here me out. Yes. Be healthy. Whatever that looks like for you. Whether you are a yogi, a vegetarian, a weight lifter, or a runner (none of which I am by the way) - power to you ladies! Be your own healthy. Physical health is important. But what I have learned from that girl on the beach in Jamaica, standing next to her chiseled new husband, is that if mentally, I was truly unhappy with myself, that version of my body, I will never actually be satisfied solely on what I look like. If I am not content with where I am at with God, who I am becoming and who I am, I can have a surf board stomach and a fantastic butt and guess what… it will never be enough for me. Really. Confidence is a mindset girls. This is something I am learning. I am prouder of my body now, after two kids, and too many slices of pizza, than I was that day on the beach. I am proud of who I have become, and am striving to be. (This takes daily practice.) Stretchmarks and all. Confidence is a mindset. If you are not proud of what your inside looks like, your outside can never mask that for you sis, sorry.

Rhetorical question here. Anyone take one last glance in the mirror before date night? Church? Girl’s night out? Do you ever get that sinking feeling? “I look tired. Is my shirt too tight? Man, I need to do more squats.” Guilty. I have been there. As recently as 4 days ago, just to keep it real. Well guess what. If I believe the words I typed above, this is on me. I am responsible for how I feel about myself. Whether I am wearing a bikini or a parka. One day I was fed up with feeling that way. I pulled a Hail Mary as my kids and husband were waiting out in the car, we were already late for church, and I had changed my outfit 3 times. I looked in the mirror. “Girl, your teeth look super white today, your eye shadow looks great, your legs look thinner today, you are strong, and you are loved.” Those simple statements… regardless of how cheesy they are, and I cannot believe I am blogging this corny secret- but if it helped me, it might help you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You. Are. Stunning. Believe it. Find self-growth. Find a version of yourself you wish you could be and fight like hell to get there. Be proud of the person, the mom, the wife, the friend that you are. That beauty you feel when you do that… that is better than a 6 pack sister. You can put stock in that.

You are incredible- go be beautiful

P